The Ride | Intentions

DEFINITION: The fact of being deliberate or purposeful. 

Once we pause to look inside, we take what we find to learn more, but what also amplifies the experience of feeling inspired and helps to motivate you into action is all about being intentional. 

To borrow an example I learned in one of the many books I have read about personal growth, imagine you are trying to get from Los Angeles to New York City within a week's time. If you make a plan - aka be intentional about how to get from point A to point B - your chances of success are fairly guaranteed. However if you start the journey without a map, a method of transportation, and desire to get there, well do I have to tell you how successful or should I say unsuccessful you will be?

Being intentional about stepping into your very next step gets you closer to living your best life, whatever that is for you. It is also important to always keep in mind that life is not etched in stone but only in death when it's on your gravestone. My point is this: setting an intention helps you visualize your very own ‘from here to there’ experience, but you may need to detour every so often based on what you experience along your journey. Please keep this in mind, so you know that when this happens, that detour is not necessarily a bad thing.

When I've been faced with a detour, it has often led to something pretty amazing I didn't even think of as a possibility. Detaching from outcomes can be challenging, although it can be a powerful method to help with personal growth. What I'm suggesting is that the less attached we are to the outcome, the easier it becomes to manage our expectations which can be a real pain when they are more often than not met. I practice this as often as I can and I will admit, it is not easy to do!

I started my own training, if you will, to remind myself that when things don't turn up the way I had hoped based on my intentions, I recognize my feelings and thoughts that led to those feelings. When it feels right, embrace the thought as a ‘what could be next?’ question. I try to get curious about it instead of feeling defeated. As with each moment of practice, it takes practice to have one and before you know it, the little voice in your head that once told you to just give up will start sharing a different message. It is uncanny when this happens. I use meditation that has changed my self-talk and it even has shown up in my dreams!

By being intentional, you tell yourself that you are serious about what you're doing and sharing with the Cosmos that you need help to get there. Another way to support yourself is to recruit an accountability partner to help you stay on track. I did just that for my writing habit! I've been waiting to write it for years and attempted to do it in fits and starts but it wasn't until I developed a practice of working with a writing partner that I have experienced my intentionality to writing on a regular basis. I have used technology, like the free version of the Marco Polo video app to check in with one another on how we're feeling and doing on each of our writing projects. It is a marvelous way to share our wins as well as our struggles to help us be more motivated to work on our projects.

Having a cheerleader to help you meet your intentions works really well for me and you can learn more about your preferred accountability approach by reading The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin. There's also a short quiz you can help you figure out how you respond to accountability. It's a tool I use at my Audacious Life Planning Retreat for Women to help attendees have more success with reaching their goals or intentions when they know what kind of motivation vibe they respond to.

A side note: I prefer to use the word intention instead of the word goals because the latter holds a lot of pressure to perform for me. Don't get me wrong, I am a high achiever and I've learned that words do matter to me when it comes to motivation. I've also learned that pursuing an intention often benefits with a soft launch. For example, when I defined my intentions to write a draft for my book, I then figured out what I wanted to end up with. This informed how I designed my month-long writing challenge I did last year. I know what I need to do in order to be  successful after doing much self-reflection on false starts and recognizing what happens when I don't complete my project. If I have too firm of a start date or outcome expectation, I self-sabotage. But if I have an official start date but create an onramp a few days earlier with a wee bit of effort, I have primed my pump for the kickoff of my intention for the daily weekly habit. I've discovered that 9 times out of 10 I am successfully going to meet my intentions by approaching it in this way. Granted, it has taken a few false starts to figure this out. It wasn't an easy lesson but well worth the time to figure it out.

As you look at how you want to live and who you want to be while living it, write out these juicy tidbits of information. There are so many tools to use to help you, one of which is an exercise I found while reading The Success Principles by Jack Canfield. With this exercise, you can lean into a vision of living your best life via seven areas of your life. I've modified the areas to the following: personal development, financial health, relationships, social and civic engagement, physical health, spiritual and creative health, and professional success.  I look at where I want to go and where I am currently at for each and create an intention statement along with three specific activities to help me get there. I read this two-page document every single morning to keep my intentions front of mind. By doing so I learn that I have accomplished all of them in some version by the end of the year. It is an astounding and powerful tool that has helped me live my best life. In some cases, I may even carry over a few to the following years to maintain my intention on an ongoing basis. It also helps me become more curious and self-aware of where my heart is when it comes to living fully.

RESOURCE LINKS
​

• Book: The Four Tendencies
• Book: The Success Principles

​