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I think I discovered the secret of life. Last week or so, I enjoyed a happy hour beverage with a new work friend who is a 24-year-old fella and we got to talk in about life. And it was in our conversation I just had this wild sensation of time travel back to when I was in my mid-twenties. I was struck by how much life had transpired since those days And I realized that had I adopted a more mindful way of being, the past few decades wouldn't feel like a blink of an eye. Nowadays, I am more mindful with my experiences. I'm really absorbing using every sense I can in a moment and when I do that it seems to make the moment seems longer and when I think back about the experience, It feels like I'm in the moment again. Does that make sense? When I'm rushing around not even looking at or thinking about what I'm experiencing, it's lost, the time is simply lost. So if you want to live a super long life, super saturate your moments by using your senses in each experience you can to make it double the lasting experience. Today, I enjoyed a delicious brunch with my friend Kamrin, which included a love fest with Buck the dog. Absorbing those moments of connecting with a friend, eating yummy french toast, and giggling over the attention of the cutest dog in the world - well, that sure was a slice of The Good Life. ❤ 
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Whoever you are, thank you. I received a beautiful floral arrangement for my birthday today and unfortunately, the card is not signed nor does it have the sender's name on it. I will do a little recon to see if I can figure out who the rascal is. I have to tell you, the sentiments on the card caused this sixty-year-old broad to cry like a baby. Everyone wants to be seen, heard, and loved. Every. Single. One. Of. Us. As a single person who lives alone, one of the few downsides of that is, I don't have person to talk with each day about how we were in the world. The words on this card... well, let's just say I feel very seen, heard, and loved.  My Aunt Vicki sent this photo of me taken when I was almost 5 years old. My Mom Mom made this sundress for me. Wah. 😭 My Aunt Susan sent me handkerchiefs once owned by Mom Mom and an Atlantic City pillowcase own by family for my birthday. Wah. 😭 What treasures! I don't have many artifacts from my family or childhood, although that has changed over the past couple of years. I have NOTHING from my mother's side of the family, which makes me sad, because items like the ones I do now have from my father's side of the family hold history and tether me to it. This is important to me. I have to wonder if I fill my own home with so many things so Lila will have her own set of artifacts. What a little cutie I was! 🥰  So. I turn 60 years well lived on November 22. I can't believe I just typed 6-0. How did this happen?! It is mind boggling that I have been around for six decades. I'll tell ya something. I am having a little bit of mixed feelings, some trouble, with this 'milestone' birthday. On one hand, I am really proud of myself in so many ways. But on the other hand, I look so old. On some days, feel old, too. Well, I feel old mostly when I look in the mirror or at some of the photos of myself and see the Dennise in the photo on the right. I feel like the photo on the left. But I see the photo on the right. Both of them were taken two weeks ago. Both of them are me. I am not looking for platitudes on this share, folks. I am being vulnerable, sharing something that is on my mind and my heart. And, yes, make no mistake - it is a post about vanity, too. I also know that I have the privilege of living a marvelous life experience full of loving connection and creative expression. I am one lucky and blessed broad. Being a woman of a certain age is loaded with lots of expectations, and most are not such good things when it comes to our culture here in the US. 95% of the time I feel like a beautiful soul and other times like crud. I guess that's what it means to be human, yes? Sometimes its great. Sometimes, not so much. Now what? I suspect I will be leaning into this age thing all week long, so get ready. I so love the photo of me on the left. It reminds me of my days of a freewheeling 30-something self! The one on the right is old age staring right back at me and I don't like it. There will be mostly celebration on Friday and also reflections about what is like for this particular broad to age in America. I live in an 'and/both' world these days. I will feel both the joy to be alive and also the grief about aging. And that is okay.  I had a little bit of an emotional hangover this morning. With the surge of cortisol and stuff after the election, I felt a bit wiped out. But I also felt some inspiration about what might be a step in a direction that feels right. My friend Lisa created Crossing Party Lines, an nationwide convening of folks to have tough conversations that lead to understanding. I participated in one of her beta sessions in Oregon about a decade ago. I totally remember the experience and have shared it with folks over the years. I was very involved in progressive civic activities at the time and it was at the session I was paired up with the then chair of the Republican Party for the state of Oregon. What an enlightening experience! Today, instead of stewing in hatred and anger, I want to see where connection and seeking to understand might lead. Perhaps setting up a local CPL chapter through my Bell Street Chapel Community with another church might pan out. Perhaps reaching out to people in my social media circle who have different political views might lead to a step in that direction as well. Of course, I have no idea where either of these will go, if anywhere but as I continue to swim in my feelings and also look at being in a place to see if one conversation might lead to some kind of healing, why the heck not?!  Happy November 1st everyone! I am kicking off the new month, the month I turn The Big 60, with some challenges and joy. This is National Novel Writing Month and for the next 30 days, I have challenged myself to just write each morning. What I am NOT doing: writing a novel nor going to freak out if I don't make my daily intention of just writing; striving for a word count or page goal. What I am doing: leaning on a creative collaborator to help me stay accountable; keeping my expectations in check and commiting to a SFD. I have been working on a book idea for a freaking decade, so no hurry. 🤣 But I am using that creative project as fodder for this month's challenge. In the meantime, I am loving the colors of the season and also pursing another creative passion. I was asked to submit for a healthcare acting project and also a self-tape for a drama. Just call me Dr. D as in determined to live an adventurous life, baby.  I have returned to Scotland for my third visit and being here fills my soul with so much joy. Namely, I get to spend time with my Darling Daughter who attends the University of St. Andrews that was founded in 1413. It is the third oldest university in the English-speaking world. St. Andrews is a seaside town northeast of Edinburgh, on Scotland’s east coast. It's known for its many golf courses, including the Old Course, with the landmark Swilcan Bridge at the 18th hole. There is also a botanical garden just outside of downtown proper. My annual visits always land on break week and the town is quite empty, which I enjoy. Someone once told me there isn't any good food to eat here and I beg to differ! My daughter and I enjoyed an amazing dinner at Rogue (reservations recommended) that included crispy pork belly for me and a sirloin steak for Lila. Not only is the food amazing, the natural beauty will take your breath away! The beach was a mere 10 minutes or so away. Unfortunately, during this visit, the famous Pier is closed due to repairs but I have walked on it during previous visits. I also did some beach-combing during this visit - one of my favorite things to do! If you would like to take a gander at photos from previous visits to Scotland, including some reflections and photos from my stay in Edinburgh, check out my previous blog by clicking here!
"Don't hate me because I am beautiful. " Does anyone remember that commercial? What a joke it is now, but back then, it was very effective advertising. I'm listening to my new favorite podcast - @wecandohardthingspodcast - And this is very topic is the discussion (I encourage you to take a listen to it). As the hosts share some reflections of their own lived experiences, I can't help to think of certain experiences I've had... One memory that came to mind was a professional experience working with a "progressive" organization in Portland, Oregon. A board member approached me and suggested that I stopped wearing makeup because I wasn't doing any favors for the feminist cause by wearing it. And a staff member was overheard saying the only reason why I was successful in my role was because of how I looked. I am not kidding you. I wish I was. Fast forward to current day. When I entered my 40s, gender ageism became very apparent and was one of the main reasons to leave Oregon and move to the Northeast. I figured folks in New England had a better sense and appreciation for old things! It was during that transition two very important things happened: I decided to stop coloring my hair and welcome my glorious silver sparkle shine through and I stopped wearing makeup with the exception of periodically wearing some fun lipstick. These 2 things have proved to be the most amazing things I could have done for myself and my confidence. Now, don't get me wrong. Yes, I like to feel pretty. But I find it very interesting that making these changes that were in an opposition of society's rules have actually fueled the fire of feeling the most beautiful in my life. Go figure.  As a multi passionate creative, I do a lot of things! Yes, it's hard to get immediate goals met because I am stretched thin in a variety of ways, but I wouldn't change a thing. But goals I do set. I like to use the word intentions as there's a little less pressure 🤣 But I have learned from thought leaders that by being intentional about goal setting you can actually get stuff done. And this adventure broad has a lot of stuff she wants to take care of and experience in the years to come. Many people have said, how do you do it all? Well, I use a number of approaches and one is constant learning. For example, I've really been leaning into growing my business enterprises and one of my challenges is in the area of sales. I have been reading a lot of books and picking and choosing some great tips and one that I had an aha moment with is the 30 day rule. Basically, what you do in the next 30 days is going to impact the next 3 months of your life. So, for example in the context of building a business, if I choose not to meet with anyone to talk about anything, guess what's going to show up over the next 90 days? Nada. Ziparoonie. With this reminder, I've invested time to make sure I'm doing something everyday. I'm also thinking about my personal life too whether it's my creative projects, traveling, coordinating events - if I don't do anything none of those things are going to happen. It isn't rocket science however if we don't invest or lean into it it's just not gonna happen. I want to live the best life I can and when I have access to resources and support, I want to not ignore them and see how I can do all these things and live a life of enjoyment and challenge. My question for you is, do you set goals (or whatever you call them) And if you do, how do you make sure you get sh*t done? I would love to hear from you!  I've been thinking a lot about expectations for myself as well as others. It's come up in a few recent conversations I've had with friends and it's got me really thinking about it. The way I choose to show up in life is to do what I say I will do and if I can't or change my mind, I strive to let others know of my shift. I also strive to live by the Golden Rule of treat others the way I would want to be treated in a situation. So, here is my question: is it a "high" - aka a stretch - expectation to hold for someone to do what they say unless they advise of a change of plans? I am soooo curious about this! When someone does what they say they are going to do, that is integrity. So, if they don't follow through on it (nor advise of a change of plans), does that mean they lack integrity? I am working on that other Golden Rule of recognizing I cannot control another person's behavior, I am only responsible for my response to it...but dang, this one is bit more of a challenge to navigate. 🤣 Another question is: how do you balance accountability with grace if balls are dropped? Very interested to read your insights!  Can we talk about fear for just a second? Oh, it's not really my favorite topic for discussion. I'm also not a big fan of anxiety. But these things show up, don't they? Today is my annual mammogran aka Boob smoosh. It is uncomfortable in many different ways. The last one I had put me in a major tailspin of fear and fortunately, it turned out just fine. What I remember about that experience was an attempt to come to terms to whatever the results turned out to be would help me live a life of intentionality and no regrets. And, girl howdy, I have lived that way ever since. No regrets. You know how much I love social media - it is a space to share stories and celebrate - but one must be mindful of what is on it. A few month's back, someone posted a comment along the lines of, 'it isn't a matter of if you will have cancer but a matter of what kind'. Now, I don't recall if that was the exact post but that is what I took away from reading it. It came to mind today and then with selective self-talk I reminded myself that is absolutely NOT TRUE for the obvious reasons. I am down talking my fear today. I won't shush it away entirely because all feelings are real and offer something for me to learn. I think today's adventure in healthcare points out several ideas for me to think about one of which is, no matter what, I will be okay. ❤  |
AuthorLet's create a BIG life one small adventure at a time! Here are a few of my experiences - perhaps you may find a little nugget or two that inspires you to take your own baby step to living your dreams! Archives
November 2024
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